I’ve been listening to old music I recorded in high school, and it made me think: There’s no way my parents listened all through the CDs I gave them. “Beneath the facade I’m keeping, I cannot see from weeping?” I think they might have had some questions about that (whether or not they would’ve gotten answers from me).
Despite how dramatic a lot of these songs are, I’m still pretty proud of everything I accomplished, considering how old I was. It makes me want to get over this dry patch and get some writing done.
It is time to change from REDNECK humor to TRUE AMERICAN Humor! Only I don’t see it as Humor, but the correct way to LIVE YOUR LIFE! If you feel the same, pass this on to your True American friends. Ya’ll know who ya’ are…
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, “One nation under God.”
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You’ve never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You still say “Christmas” instead of “Winter Festival.”
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You bow your head when someone prays.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You stand, remove your hat and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You’ve never burned an American flag.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.
- You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You’d give your last dollar to a friend.
If you got this email from me, it is because I believe that you, like me, have just enough TRUE AMERICAN in you to have the same beliefs as those talked about in this email.
This is excellent, no matter what you deem fit to call it. It is our country, it is our way of LIFE, and I love it. If you agree please keep it going. Pass it on. God Bless the USA!
Git ‘r done, Dude!
You might be a true american if:
- You’ve ever told a child they or their parents were going to hell.
- You still say “Easter” instead of “Spring Pagan Drunk Orgie-rama.”
- You went on a jingoist rant but pretended you were telling jokes
I’m in some kind of limbo. I’m living in New Jersey, and I’m working this job, and everything is pointed at / aligned with the future. I do not want to live in New Jersey. I don’t want to be doing what I’m doing forever. So we’re waiting for the time when we can move and find new jobs and have friends. But in the meantime, everything is passing time.
This is my classic problem. When I was in college I had the same eschatological focus for once I got out. And although it’s a little fuzzier, when I was in high school I thought a lot about getting out and moving on to college. I understand that people have to have hope for the future, that it drives us. But I need to figure out for myself how to better enjoy the meantime. Maybe in the grander scheme my wheels are squealing right before I peel out. (You know me, always trying to work a car analogy into conversation) Maybe I will accomplish all the goals I wish I could accomplish. But that doesn’t change the fact that I need to be here, now.
My last semester in college I had an apartment above the dentist’s office. We would have twister parties, and sing awesome songs. I want a twister party right now.
Who writes e-mail forwards?? That’s what I want to know. They are so ridiculous that I can’t believe they were written seriously. But then there are errors and poor phrasing that I can’t imagine someone would write intentionally.
This is dedicated to those Born 1930-1979!
TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930’s 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s !!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
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Subject: please read this…. this is pretty powerful SATAN’S MEETING
SATAN’S MEETING: (Read even if you’re busy)
Satan called a worldwide convention of demons. In his opening address he said,
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I don’t know what happened in my fax line’s past relationships, but it apparently got around, because every day I get the stupidest junk faxes. (Here I’m implying my fax line had fax intercourse and acquired a fax std) The fax sits on a shelf above my desk with no incoming basket, so every time I come in in the morning there’s ads for mortgages and owning your own business scattered across the desk and floor.
But the other day I got a fax that wasn’t junk, it was a resume. Stephen Markowitz isn’t an AV tech, he’s a web designer / copy writer, so I can’t help him out. But he included links to some of his work, so check it out, and let him know if you could use his services:
