The other day a major company had a meeting at my hotel. They requested a large number of flipcharts for some kind of training event. After it was over, I went in to take everything down and the room was full of flipcharts that said things like:

• “Other than the price being too high do you have any other concerns regarding ESP?”


• “Other than cost is there any other questions about ESP?”


• “Is it the price or the payment?”


• “So you feel the ESP price is too high?”


• “So what are you saying, is the price of ESP too high?”

I have a couple questions. First: Is this company planning to sell the secret of Extra Sensory Perception to the public? Second: Was this training session held so salespeople could practice scoffing at customers? “So wait. Are you saying the price is too high??”

Ok, so I just wrote about the conversation I had with a fellow manager who liked to call me “buddy” and “big guy.” I just talked to him again for like, 30 seconds. And in that time he didn’t refer to me as “buddy” or “big guy”, but he worked in several instances of “dude,” “man,” “buckaroo” and even “chap.” I can’t tell if he’s awesome or not. But I think he might be.

Sometimes I receive e-mail forwards which make such excellent use of the medium that I can’t faithfully reproduce them here. The following e-mail is one such case. When reading it, the best you can do to capture the original’s glory is imagine the text is huge and red, and that each quasi-sentence is followed by several carriage returns. Enjoy.

(more…)

It’s time again for me to share a wonderful e-mail forward with you:

Yes, Christmas cards. This is coming early (really early) so that you can get ready to include an important address to your list.

Read on….....

What a GREAT idea!

Fun with the ACLU…...

Wanna have some fun this CHRISTMAS? Send the ACLU a CHRISTMAS CARD this year.

I had to call another site because the previous manager lent them my equipment. I don’t know how many times in the course of a two minute conversation I was referred to as “buddy” or “big guy.” But it was a lot. I guess it’s better to be perceived as someone’s chummy sidekick than an annoyance.

So today in the sales office, the topic of discussion was Steve Irwin’s death by sting ray. This naturally led to one co-worker’s statement that “We don’t belong in the ocean.”

Think about it. Can you breath underwater? Are you a fish? Exactly. You don’t belong in the ocean. Get out of there. She’s very firm about her philosophy and nothing you say will change her mind.

UPDATE: The subject arose again at lunch with a different set of people. I learned that she holds these beliefs “from the core of her being,” and that the last time she went swimming in the ocean was on spring break with her girlfriends in Mexico.